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ask me anything
Will you still love me, tomorrow?

Success is

GAME NOT OVER UNTIL YOU WIN.

That’s my mentality.
Play until you win.

This entry was written by Joey, posted on June 28, 2010 at 12:49 am, filed under Photos, Self-diagnoses and tagged , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

In reaction to:
“No one tells you when you’re little that you’ll get involved in someone’s life and spend all this time and effort caring about them… then one day,
you’ll just be two strangers again.”

I think loneliness is the distance between the present and the last person to love you.

[Quote excerpted from Et puis? by Meredith]

This entry was written by Joey, posted on June 24, 2010 at 5:55 am, filed under Love, Self-diagnoses and tagged , , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

Tell-all Tuesdays
If he wanted to, he would.

You ask, I tell. Best questions get posted on Tuesdays.

Your so bloody hot…why don’t you have a boyfriend?
I’m no good at men.

I don’t expect men to consider me for anything more than just sex and so the self-fulfilling prophecy plays its inevitable part and hands me exactly what I expect.



I’m too cool, too detached to start off.

I don’t call when I want to, I don’t reveal much about myself and certainly not how I feel about the person I’m dating.

Once I decide I actually want someone to be my boyfriend I become too intense, too insecure, too jealous, too obsessive. Too much of everything.

(Now that I’ve admitted this, I’ll NEVER have a boyfriend!)



Because of the nature of my job, I’m always running away.

No boy has ever asked me to stay. 



Maybe that’s why I don’t have a boyfriend?

Or maybe not.




Why do you think?

What’s the deal with women or your age? Is it all about being desired? Is that it? You just want people to pine and be all doe-eyed over you and then your “not attracted” to someone who is genuinely interested, because its not thrilling. Its BS.
What’s the deal with women any age?

What’s the deal with MEN any age?



Doesn’t EVERYONE want to be desired?

Doesn’t everyone like the thrill of finding someone where there is MUTUAL ATTRACTION?



Ay, there’s the rub. Women my age, and of any age do want to be desired. YES, they want someone who is genuinely interested. Just like you do. 

It is BS that not everyone can be genuinely interested in everyone who is genuinely interested in them. That’s why it’s so magical when it works out.

Why do you always get involved with assholes and douche bags when nice guys are always near?
Here’s the thing about attraction, it happens instantly. Before you get to know a person and I mean really get to know them, attraction brings you together. How much can you get to know a guy in a few weeks? Probably not a lot, but lately, that’s all the time I have with someone. If they end up being an asshole or a douche bag, my involvement with them also tends to end. Then you get to hear about it because it’s juicy.



I’ve dated nice guys. I like nice guys.

Nice guys don’t get write ups. Except for in secret blogs. 
The problem is that I am nowhere near them anymore. Even when I want to be.

if you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?
I just want to live where I’m in love. I don’t know where that place is yet, which may as well be seeing as I lead a nomadic life.

What is the best part of your life?
I have the greatest friends. Knowing that the most tolerant, intelligent, beautiful people I know are only a phone call, text, e-mail away be they in Hong Kong, Toronto, LA or the UK is the best part of my life. (I know, right?)

If you could go back in time 10 years and give your younger self one sentence of relationship advice, what would you say?
Be patient, if he wanted to, he would.

Have a question for me? Ask away here.

This entry was written by Joey, posted on June 8, 2010 at 8:59 pm, filed under Friends, Love, Self-diagnoses, Sex, Tell-all Tuesdays and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

Society Girl Porn

That’s what my friend, Charles, referred to it as. It being my former blog. From whence some of you have come to this new trick. It’s a little different, even if the girl in the photos looks the same.

I’ve received e-mails, DMs, wall posts asking why I shut zucket down or if it’s gone for good. I don’t know if I’ll ever bring it back but for now, I’d like to move on.

Sass as an alter-ego and the whole ‘society girl porn’ malarky was a fantasy.
Most importantly, it was supposed to be fun.
Until there were too many people who weren’t in on the joke.
Myself included.

Sass partied too hard and drank too much with her DJ/promoter/band/server/model/blogger/actor/hotyoungbabescenester friends, dated disastrously, only ate in the late afternoon and over-shared every bit of it. For years.

Joey in the mean time made a habit of biking to several events every day, stayed sober, said hi to a few friends, took hundreds of photos, posed for them, scolded her pretty loves for doing bumps on keys in bathroom stalls, for smoking even, failed at every relationship, went home alone, edited photos, attempted to be witty, stayed on top of several social mediums, became increasingly annoyingly archival and stats obsessed, constantly explained and excused it all while working at an ad agency full time, a retail store part time and freelancing, busting each ass cheek trying to overachieve.

Did I meet many of my favourite people in the world because of it? Yes, gratefully.
Did I score swag, privileged access, cash and cheques? Yes, just enough.
Did I learn much along the way? Yes, I’d like to think so.
Did I enjoy writing it? Yes, of course.
Do I miss it? A little.

I’m trying.
I’m glad you’re still here.

Love,

Your girl

Images from: Carl W. Heindl, Cobrasnake, Kyle Hutton, Last Night’s Party, Matthew Broszkowski, Shark vs. Bear, TakeMorePhotos. The Paper Camera, zucket.com (2007-2010).

This entry was written by Joey, posted on May 26, 2010 at 4:38 am, filed under Joey Ng, Self-diagnoses and tagged , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

On intimacy

Sex is easy, it’s everything else that’s hard. The paradigm has shifted and sex isn’t love anymore. I find that all the supposed pre-cursors that we skip for the sake of non-commitment are what have become taboo.

Sleeping next to someone is difficult. You never really do. It begins to feel like a timed game with too many variables. Obligatory, almost. And you can’t sleep with a giant pea wedged in your consciousness. Unless you’re really drunk.

The most intimate moment I can recently recall was when a man kissed me on the forehead, ever so lightly when he thought I was asleep. It was the sweetest thing anyone had done for me in the past 3 years and we were barely lucid.

I feel violated by the simplest of touches. Fingertips on shoulders, hair being played with, hands on smalls of back. But you could hit me, throw me around, bruise me from the inside out and it would all be fair game on familiar ground. Pretty backwards, eh?

And you know what makes me nervous? Holding a man’s hand. It’s fucking unnerving.
I can’t do it. Not without fear.

And you think you’re shy?

This entry was written by Joey, posted on May 20, 2010 at 6:12 am, filed under Love, Self-diagnoses, Sex. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

I suffer from the spotlight effect.

I am deeply egocentric. I can guarantee you that I can and often do spin, twist and wry any event as a manifestation of the universe and its people unto, because and about me. Also, I believe that I am being watched and scrutinized by others.

Frankly, this is simply untrue.

“Indeed, close inspection reveals frequent disparities between the way we view our performance… and the way it is actually seen by others.” (Gilovich et al., 2000)

“I think you’re crazy” – Michelle

I need to let go of it. At least some.

Reference:
Gilovich, T., Medvec, V. H. & Savitsky, K. (2000). The Spotlight Effect in Social Judgement: An Egocentric Bias in Estimates of the Salience of One’s Own Actions and Appearance. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78 211-222.

This entry was written by Joey, posted on February 1, 2010 at 6:36 am, filed under Psychology, Self-diagnoses and tagged , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.


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