JOEY NG e-mail
ask me anything
Will you still love me, tomorrow?

Neither joy nor luck

Things we learn from our mothers. Like how to love.
I was about four when my mother told me that she didn’t marry for love.
That people generally don’t. But that it was just the right time.
Cuz my daddy was an honest man,
from a good family,
he wasn’t going to hurt her.
Cuz he asked and she was nearly 30.

She said “always be with someone who loves you more than you love them.”
She did.
Because to love someone
more than they do you, would be to suffer
and I, her daughter, did not deserve to live a life in pain.

And so I vowed, never to settle for a schmuck I didn’t respect, didn’t ridiculously adore
just to be safe yet unsatiated.

But these men, with all their genius and magic-stry,
I suppose, never wanted to settle with me – the one who’d always pretend
to love him less.

The things we learn from our mothers.

This entry was written by Joey, posted on August 3, 2010 at 4:58 am, filed under Love, Photos, Self-diagnoses, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

In reaction to:
“No one tells you when you’re little that you’ll get involved in someone’s life and spend all this time and effort caring about them… then one day,
you’ll just be two strangers again.”

I think loneliness is the distance between the present and the last person to love you.

[Quote excerpted from Et puis? by Meredith]

This entry was written by Joey, posted on June 24, 2010 at 5:55 am, filed under Love, Self-diagnoses and tagged , , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.

Tell-all Tuesdays
If he wanted to, he would.

You ask, I tell. Best questions get posted on Tuesdays.

Your so bloody hot…why don’t you have a boyfriend?
I’m no good at men.

I don’t expect men to consider me for anything more than just sex and so the self-fulfilling prophecy plays its inevitable part and hands me exactly what I expect.

I’m too cool, too detached to start off.

I don’t call when I want to, I don’t reveal much about myself and certainly not how I feel about the person I’m dating.

Once I decide I actually want someone to be my boyfriend I become too intense, too insecure, too jealous, too obsessive. Too much of everything.

(Now that I’ve admitted this, I’ll NEVER have a boyfriend!)

Because of the nature of my job, I’m always running away.

No boy has ever asked me to stay. 

Maybe that’s why I don’t have a boyfriend?

Or maybe not.

Why do you think?

What’s the deal with women or your age? Is it all about being desired? Is that it? You just want people to pine and be all doe-eyed over you and then your “not attracted” to someone who is genuinely interested, because its not thrilling. Its BS.
What’s the deal with women any age?

What’s the deal with MEN any age?

Doesn’t EVERYONE want to be desired?

Doesn’t everyone like the thrill of finding someone where there is MUTUAL ATTRACTION?

Ay, there’s the rub. Women my age, and of any age do want to be desired. YES, they want someone who is genuinely interested. Just like you do. 

It is BS that not everyone can be genuinely interested in everyone who is genuinely interested in them. That’s why it’s so magical when it works out.

Why do you always get involved with assholes and douche bags when nice guys are always near?
Here’s the thing about attraction, it happens instantly. Before you get to know a person and I mean really get to know them, attraction brings you together. How much can you get to know a guy in a few weeks? Probably not a lot, but lately, that’s all the time I have with someone. If they end up being an asshole or a douche bag, my involvement with them also tends to end. Then you get to hear about it because it’s juicy.

I’ve dated nice guys. I like nice guys.

Nice guys don’t get write ups. Except for in secret blogs. 
The problem is that I am nowhere near them anymore. Even when I want to be.

if you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?
I just want to live where I’m in love. I don’t know where that place is yet, which may as well be seeing as I lead a nomadic life.

What is the best part of your life?
I have the greatest friends. Knowing that the most tolerant, intelligent, beautiful people I know are only a phone call, text, e-mail away be they in Hong Kong, Toronto, LA or the UK is the best part of my life. (I know, right?)

If you could go back in time 10 years and give your younger self one sentence of relationship advice, what would you say?
Be patient, if he wanted to, he would.

Have a question for me? Ask away here.

This entry was written by Joey, posted on June 8, 2010 at 8:59 pm, filed under Friends, Love, Self-diagnoses, Sex, Tell-all Tuesdays and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.