If you’re unhappy with the way things are going (which I was), don’t look at your available options and settle for the least of all evils. Go ahead and do your favourite fucking thing. Figure out what that is because until you do, it doesn’t matter what you’re doing. It will eat at you, dull you, little by little.
I? Moved in with this guy, Chris Reed.
In New York, New York. Whoop!
For the first time in 3 years, I have my name on a lease. Keys I won’t have to return in a matter of weeks, a mailing address that doesn’t belong to a factory, and a bed. My bed.
I have all my things.
I get to wake up and come home to my very own little version of family.
We had a housewarming party on Canada day.
You can tell this is a social media required household.
We had the pleasure of hosting many a special Canadian guest. Meredith drove across the border for the first time!
And because this city is the greatest, I’ve found many more friends and they all dranks beers on our roof.
Come over sometime.
This entry was written by Chris Reed, Events, Friends, Joey Ng, New York and tagged American Apparel, Austin Otto, Chinatown, Chris Reed, Destinee Handly, Disco Short, Foursquare, Internet Fame, Ioana Hercberg, Lacee Swan, Manhattan, Maria Aoki, Meredith Cheesbrough, Nisia Wasilewicz, Nylon Tricot High-Cut One-Piece, Rocky Li, Shenan Fraguadas, Social Media, Todd Pendu, Twitter, Zana Bayne. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink., posted on July 30, 2012 at 9:07 am, filed under
by Chris Reed
[A guest post]
Put the kleenex down and stop freaking out. This isn’t about Mr. or Ms. Right versus Mr. or Ms. Right-Now. This isn’t about being in a relationship or being single, neither is it about polygamy or monogamy, nor anything so tightly defined. This is about how there is no “The One” for me or you, and about how that is okay.
I live in New York, the most populous city in North America, I’m straight, and I’m 25. That leaves less than 0.5% of the world’s population to sample when looking for my soulmate, who – if she exists – is probably in India or China, and we will most likely never meet.
Kleenex down! This is a good thing! Free from the pressure of finding a perfect mate who fulfills your every desire and never fucks it up ever, you can seek alternatives to the old models that breed resentment and result in failure.
Entering a relationship knowing that it’ll eventually end doesn’t mean I don’t get lost in my partner. It doesn’t mean that we don’t have a great time. It doesn’t mean that we don’t have great sex; that we don’t make each other better people; that it doesn’t hurt when it ends. What it means is that there is no one experience worth forfeiting all other experiences. It is an admission that as we grow and change as people, our desires grow and change and that drifting apart is as natural as coming together.
Love no longer has to be Kerouac’s “long sad tale ending in graves” but a series of informed encounters that are structured to be conducive to you and your partner(s) needs. Remember this as you spend the rest of your life with The Only One – yourself.