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This entry was written by , posted on August 8, 2010 at 4:23 am, filed under Friends, Joey Ng, Photos, San Francisco and tagged American Apparel, California, Cotton Ottoman Rib Jacket, H&M, Hana Go, Joey Ng, Nylon Spandex Micro-Mesh Bra Bodysuit, San Francisco, Tri-Blend Pocket Jumpsuit. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
Things we learn from our mothers. Like how to love.
I was about four when my mother told me that she didn’t marry for love.
That people generally don’t. But that it was just the right time.
Cuz my daddy was an honest man,
from a good family,
he wasn’t going to hurt her.
Cuz he asked and she was nearly 30.
She said “always be with someone who loves you more than you love them.”
She did.
Because to love someone
more than they do you, would be to suffer
and I, her daughter, did not deserve to live a life in pain.
And so I vowed, never to settle for a schmuck I didn’t respect, didn’t ridiculously adore
just to be safe yet unsatiated.
But these men, with all their genius and magic-stry,
I suppose, never wanted to settle with me – the one who’d always pretend
to love him less.
The things we learn from our mothers.
This entry was written by , posted on August 3, 2010 at 4:58 am, filed under Love, Photos, Self-diagnoses, Writing and tagged American Apparel, Ballet Pink, California, Love, Men, Multi-Layered Reversible Petticoat, My mother, San Francisco. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
This entry was written by , posted on July 22, 2010 at 2:50 am, filed under Friends, Photos, San Francisco and tagged California, Nathan Savoy, San Francisco. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
You ask, I tell. Selection of questions posted on Tuesdays.
How many men have you slept with?
Very few, I rarely truly fall asleep with another person in bed with me. Read this.
Why’d you and the morgan waters show break up????????
I’ve never been in a relationship with a television show.
Would you ever want to try again with the one who got away? I feel like he took a little piece of your heart and every time you write about him it makes me misty in the eye.
The magic of writing about how you feel in regards to people you care for is that those feelings are generally universal. At any given moment I could be writing about anyone, or several ones and/or in reference to one or many applicable instances.
Yes, a long time ago, there was one who took a giant piece of my heart. Maybe even an entire ventricle. Not so much because he ‘got away’ than the fact that he made a conscious decision to be with someone else. I have absolutely no desire to be recklessly in love, under-appreciated and humiliated again.
As for the men who’ve chipped away at the little pieces after that, well, none of our relationships had passed the point of no return. You never know what could happen.
Thank you for reading, though. Dry your eyes, mate.
I think you reveal quite a bit about yourself on the internet. Why do you do that?
I’ve been blogging as early as geocities was around. It started with sharing photos and thoughts with friends long before the advent of facebook. Coming from an international school, my social circle was scattered across the world in the final years of high school. It then became natural for me to document compulsively. I found my outlet for creativity.
Some people keep their diaries locked up under their beds, I keep mine on the internet. Maybe someone will read something and think “yes, me too” or laugh a little or gain an understanding of another’s perspective.
I don’t want to be alone with my memories.
What is something that not many people know about you?
I’m irrationally afraid of my own mortality. For example, I once walked out of the Simpsons movie (SIMPSONS!) because the scene set in the future where they live in a bubble made me realise I wasn’t going to be alive in year 20-whatever and had a panic attack.
What’s your favourite song right now?
I’m Not the Sun by Arkells. Meredith introduced me to it a few months ago and I still haven’t tired of it.
Are you a sports fan? Who are your favorite teams?
Depends on the sport and the game. Lakers (Basketball), England (Football), Canada (Life).
Got a question for me? Ask away here.
This entry was written by , posted on July 13, 2010 at 2:13 am, filed under Tell-all Tuesdays and tagged Arkells, Bass, Beauty Bar, Blogging, Break-ups, California, Canada, DTLA, Hana Go, Joey Ng, Lakers, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Silverlake, Silversun Liquor, Weejuns. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
This entry was written by , posted on June 20, 2010 at 6:44 am, filed under Photos, San Francisco and tagged California, Paloma Villalobos, San Francisco. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
You ask, I tell. Selection of questions get posted on Tuesdays.
You dated morgan waters, correct? Did you enjoy it?
Yes, I dated Morgan Waters.
Why do you hold on to this concept of ‘love’ so endearingly, when the chemical romance phase diffuses out so quickly? Why not have someone who can both love and support you? Why cling on to such an idealistic dream, and wallow when you cannot obtain it?
I hold on to this concept of ‘love’ because all my relationships diffuse before the chemicals stop firing. People need something to hold on to, a prize, a goal, something to aspire to, hope and long for. It keeps you going. I’d like to know what it’s like to get there. All the things that happen while you’re going for it, are pretty great as well.
I’d love to have someone who can both love and support me. Sometimes I feel like I already have that person in my life, I’m just not in a romantic relationship with them. So maybe it is idealistic, to try to find it all in one person. I don’t expect that I will, but I’m damn sure going to try. Practical people have ideals, too.
I think for someone who likes to write, tragedy is romantic. Hanging on to the moments that make you angry or sad juices the creativity out of you. The published word is just a snapshot of the whole picture. I assure you, 90% of the time, I am thinking, talking and taking pictures of what I had for lunch.
How did you lose your virginity? What was he like? Where did it happen?
I met this guy at the open mic night at Einstein’s bar. He was dreamy and lovely. I still see him around from time to time. It happened in my dorm room twinkling with blue fairy lights.
Do you like having sex?
Yes, it’s my sport.
What are the three things you most want to experience in your lifetime?
1. Having a family.
2. Producing something creative that I can be proud of.
3. Seeing my mother truly joyful again.
Who is one person you look up to and why?
Tony Pierce. I only hope to one day be as honest, endearing and dork nasty of a blogger as he is. The blogfather tells it like it is, nay, ought to be. When he tells me what to do, I usually say ‘no’ then end up adhering to his advice anyway. He has built a life of rock n’ roll, hot babes, blogging and true love – what’s not to look up to?
Who are your best friends?
I have a lot of really amazing friends, but if I ever found myself crying in the parking lot of a gay bar in a foreign city because a boy dumped me over text, these are the people I would call.
Toronto: Jacquie, Masha, Meredith, Sam
LA: Candis
SF: Hana
Hong Kong: Sharon
When are you coming back to the Big Smoke?
Not in the foreseeable future.
Have a question for me? Ask away here.
This entry was written by , posted on June 15, 2010 at 9:23 pm, filed under Friends, Love, Sex, Tell-all Tuesdays and tagged California, Hello Kitty, Joey Ng, Kitsch Gallery, San Francisco, Tony Pierce, Toronto. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
This entry was written by , posted on June 14, 2010 at 1:47 pm, filed under Photos, San Francisco and tagged California, Kitsch Gallery, Lace, San Francisco, Stolichnaya, Vodka. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
This entry was written by , posted on June 12, 2010 at 2:41 am, filed under Photos, San Francisco and tagged California, Kitsch Ball, Kitsch Gallery, San Francisco. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
This entry was written by , posted on May 13, 2010 at 10:37 am, filed under Love, Photos, San Francisco and tagged California, Mission District, San Francisco. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.